Marc Jacobs show review

Louis Lanzano / AP

Marc Jacobs

I am particularly unqualified to review this show. I had no idea what was going on for the first two-thirds of it. Would women actually wear these outfits? Or would they just buy one of the things each model was wearing and wear it with stuff that actually matched? Was Marc Jacobs just making an artistic statement that has nothing to do with wearing clothing? Did the program need to thank that many people? He thanked three people named Andrea, three named Carlos, three Irenes, three Jasons, three Jennifers, three Josephs, three Katys, three Laurens, three Marias, three Roberts, three Ruths and four Peters.

Marc Jacobs is clearly very important. This was a big packed venue, with rows of people standing and lots of celebrities. I went backstage after and all these people - Sofia Copola, Perry Farrell - were posing with him. It was like backstage at a big rock show. The after-party was so packed, they couldn't let everyone who was invited in.

Still, my uneducated guess is that the first two-thirds were pretty ugly. It was like costuming for the part of the movie where Diane Keaton is fine, just fine with the fact that her husband left her. Only Diane Keaton is living in the 1940s and she only has access to shiny wrapping paper and an old plaid shirt to make her clothing.

I did like all the shoes, especially since he moved the heel from the end to an inch from the end. That looked cool, although even less likely my wife would be willing to walk instead of getting a cab.

Louis Lanzano / AP

Marc Jacobs

And despite my earlier blog about the lameness of pantsuits, that was a cool charcoal pantsuit in a just slightly Al Capone way. But the pant suit with shorts? Too far, Marc Jacobs, too far.

The two pink striped dresses were really pretty. One had a long slit up the side and a toga sort of sleeve. The other was backless and armless and almost as good.

What was with the cloth waist belt cumberbund things? Do I like them? Maybe I do. Marc Jacobs might be expanding my definition of acceptable women's clothing. Or he might just have exhausted my eyes until they gave up.

The high-waisted leather-looking pleated skirt with the bow on the back made me sad that men and women can think so differently.

I am pretty impressed that none of the models fell. There were mirrors everywhere. Putting models in front of mirrors and expecting them to walk is like leaving Mars bars around the stage and expecting John Goodman to win an Oscar.

Basically, I think Marc Jacobs - with his 1940s, ankle-length skirts made of shiny prints - is trying to make the recession fun. Which just might not work.